Conclusion

So, I understand why she was pissed at me for the last week. Remember my last post? Well, yesterday she told me that she kinda saw it as a booty call, only a little less bad, because we've both drawn lines we won't cross at necking. I hadn't thought of it that way at all, and I was completely taken aback when she told me that was the problem. (I mean, I just told her I missed her, and she suggested she meet me somewhere, so I assumed she'd be fine with the lateness of the hour. I did accept her offer, so that makes it all my fault somehow.) All last week I'd been feeling like I was being stabbed in the heart every 20 seconds. I figured that she probably hated me. Not quite, but for some reason, asking her what I did wrong made her angrier at me. I went into a state of emotional shutdown for a couple hours, starting just before she told me about it. At some point, I felt like gravity was going two different directions than normal, and my hips were being pulled left while my head, shoulders, and feet went the other direction. It was a strange sensation considering that there was nothing in the way of drugs or even pain medication in my system that could have had that effect, because there were no drugs or medications of any kind in my body. At some point, my emotions rebooted. I think it was about 11:45 p.m. when that happened. I had somehow succeeded in keeping my emotions completely out of the picture for a few hours. I'm not entirely sure it helped, but I think it did. Then I had a weird dream. I'm pretty sure that at the beginning of the dream, my family was downstairs and my older brother climbed into the ceiling. I don't know why. Then, a while later, my now ex girlfriend came over and hung out with my family and me for the evening. We were just friends, and nothing happened. We didn't even hold hands, and it was okay. It was kinda reassuring that everything would be okay. I guess it gave me closure. I told her about it, and I told her that I was okay with not being together. I'm sure I'll miss it sometimes, but in one night's dream, I went from loving her with all my heart to loving her like a sister (granted, an attractive sister, but not someone to pursue). It was fun and/or extremely intense and/or very painful all at the same time. I suppose that's kinda typical for a summer romance, but I'm not too sure. Oh well, there are many fish in the sea, as the saying goes. I hope I find another like her someday, but perhaps with a little less fear, and a little more love.

Movie Mishaps

Well, I went to a movie on Friday, and it was awesome. I went and saw the Bourne Legacy. Good movie. Go see it. It has little plot, less than the other 3 Bourne movies, which is really hard to do. It's still awesome, though.
The thing is, I went alone, because nobody answered my posts on Facebook and nobody showed up. It was a little disappointing, but it wasn't too bad. So as I was walking home, I was texting my girlfriend and then I asked if I could call her (because I prefer talking instead of texting. There is less information lost talking.), and she told me yes, and I did, and at some point while I was walking home (the theater isn't very far away), I told her that I missed her, to which she replied, "Do you want to see me?" I told her yes, I always want to see her, and as it turned out, she was driving home from work.
We met up at a park near my house. By that time, it was 10:20 p.m. That's not exactly a good time to start hanging out, but it didn't really occur to me. You know that feeling you get after sitting and watching a movie in a theater, where it seems like less time than you've spent there has passed? Well, it didn't really feel that late to me, so I didn't think about it. We hung out, talked a little, and generally enjoyed each other's company for about 40 minutes. It felt like 4 minutes. Then, we leaned up against her car and made out for a while, and before either of us knew it, it was 11:50. She got off work at 10, and wasn't supposed to make any stops on the way home. Unfortunately, I was the one with an alibi, and she got in trouble. Needless to say, I feel sort of responsible, and she probably hates me. I can't say for sure, because she sent me one text explaining that she got her phone taken away, and was grounded from friends, Facebook, and her phone for a month. Then a few minutes later, she sent a text telling me not to contact her, and if she wanted to talk, she would talk to me.
Life kinda sucks right now.
Well, there is a wake up call for me. Time  may not matter much, but timing  matters a whole lot. Context matters, people! Remember that.

Emotions vs Olympics

GAH! Emotions are crazy. Ever felt like time had suddenly lost meaning? I bet you have. Has that feeling ever lasted for over 24 hours? Probably not for you. Everything seems to take about the same amount of time. A second lasts a year, and a year lasts a second, and things that once seemed forever away in the future seem like they are raining down upon you in all their fury. Needless to say, in this condition, it's kind of difficult to judge a current situation accurately. Problems tend to happen. Bleah.

So the Olympics are cool. People are doing some crazy stuff. Breaking world records, being awesome, you know, the works. Go people! Be patriotic! Represent your country, athletes! Support those athletes, countries! GO TEAM USA!!! I'm sorry if I have offended any of you with my outburst of patriotism, but I happen to support my country. You all should too, or if you don't, move to where you want to be. That's my 2 cents.

Okay, so there wasn't really any battle betwixt feelings and sports, but whatever.